Every election year, you hear the gripes from someone famous threatening to move abroad if their favored candidate doesn’t win the White House.
While it happens on both political sides, many well-known Americans are talking about “moving to Canada” to get away from a possible Trump presidency. But why limit yourself to Canada?
Here are nine spots where Ruth Bader Ginsburg, Cher, Samuel L. Jackson, Jon Stewart, Rosie O’Donnell and other lefty luminaries might find affinity with their progressive brethren in these places they could call home.
Venezuela: A People’s Paradise
Tangerine sunsets beckon you to cozy up in this ‘people’s republic of paradise’ ensconced in the Cordillera de la Costa Central mountain range.
Image Credit: Federico Parra/Getty Images
On a hillside crook sits the not-so-bucolic socialist center of South America.
Image Credit: Kimberly White/Getty Images
Caracas, Venezuela, boasts shortages of bread, aspirin, diapers, and toilet paper, among other basics. A growing black market, however, should sustain all your needs — that is, if you don’t use the local currency. Exploding inflation has made even the printing of money un-affordable.
But paradise does have other drawbacks. The sale of guns to private parties has been outlawed by the communist dictatorship. As a result, Caracas is the murder capital of the world.
Mexico: Open Borders Bliss
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In a city blessed by none other than Pope Francis, sits a veritable promised land on the Mexico/Texas border.
Ciudad, Juarez, is as close to heaven as you can get. That’s because the murder rate in the drug trafficking cartel capital is the highest in Mexico and the city is considered to be one of the most dangerous places in the world. Life expectancy has gone down by three years.
Mexico’s government is ill-equipped to combat the drug cartels that have carved up the country into their own gangland fiefdoms, the violence from which sporadically spills over to the U.S. side of the border and endangers Americans. But, for those who aspire to live the progressive dream of open borders, you can hardly do better than Ciudad Juarez!
Haiti: A Caribbean Oasis
The azure Caribbean laps at your front door in this island hideaway.
Walk the bleached, white sandy beaches that eventually lead you to the buzzing capital city of…
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…Port Au Prince, Haiti.
The capital city is still the scene of flattened houses, feces-filled cesspools, and cholera-tainted water following the ruinous 2010 earthquake.
The authoritarian regime, with the help of the Clinton Foundation, has given people cell phones. But the city is still in need of rebuilding, despite hundreds of millions raised to help.
Zany Zimbabwe!
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For more than 100 years, Zimbabwe was among the most prosperous economies in Africa.
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After more than 100 years of rule under the old name of Rhodesia, Zimbabwe’s Marxist leader, Robert Mugabe, began confiscating the private farms and other property owned by white people and forcing them to flee or die.
The now-cratered agrarian economy has been so dicey that the inflation rate has been as high as 89.8 sextillion percent (89,700,000,000,000,000,000,000%), so pack an extra suitcase to carry change for dinner.
Rojo Refugio de Cuba
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Step back in time when spicy Caribbean ambiance consumed the senses.
Where the roots of revolution meet 1940s modernity.
Image Credit: Yamil Lage/Getty Images
Where red doesn’t just refer to the sunsets — it’s a state of mind!
Image Credit: Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images
Welcome to Cuba! But pack your own BandAids and antibiotics to be on the safe side. And your own wash cloth. And soap.
Angola: Surf City, MPLA!
When it comes to one of the finest surfing experiences in the world, it’s hard to beat the white sands and frothy breakers of Barra da Kwanza Beach.
Though Angola’s economy is ranked 133 in the world, in the bottom rung of countries, don’t let that eclipse your enjoyment of the very real accomplishments of strongman José Eduardo dos Santos, president of Angola.
There’s plenty of shopping to satisfy your creature comforts.
Image Credit: Khaled Desouki/Getty Images
There are group political activities, like the People’s Movement for the Liberation of Angola (MPLA)! And for the kids, there’s the Youth of the MPLA activities to take part in.
Image Credit: Stephane De Sakutin/Getty Images
Come for the surfing, stay for Angola’s promised “progressive politics for a fairer world.”
Russia: Arctic Circle Green Dream
The Northern Lights excite the senses and spark every philanthropic impulse in this Arctic Circle haven.
The authoritarian Russian outpost of Salekhard in the Arctic Circle is perfect for those who want a little ‘me’ time. The population of Salekhard is 43,000, but when individual bottles of vodka are included in the mix, well, the sky’s the limit.
The self described “progressive” city on the Arctic Circle provides the perfect opportunity for global warming aficionados to measure glaciers and count polar bears during the ample daylight hours.
Bring your Uggs. And polar bear repellent.
China: People’s Republic of Utopia!
It may be hard to see clearly now — literally — but there could be real opportunities in this smoke-filled metropolis for disaffected U.S. women voters who want to flee to a place that sets the standard for ultimate community.
And there’s nowhere in the world that is more little-red-bookish than the place that birthed it: The People’s Republic of China.
In Tianjin, seek inspiration from the favorable ratio of men to women, a government that takes care of your every need from free abortions, ‘fair’ wages for all, hospital masks and a bike in every one-room-flat. Practice group Tai Chi at any number of “people’s parks” around the city.
Bring lots of money and your own water. Leave your Bible at home.
Amazing ANWR!
Don’t have a passport, but still want to get away from the effects of a Trump presidency?
The 19-million-acre Alaska Wildlife Refuge (ANWR, pronounced ANN-war), was established as a park by President Jimmy Carter. But the tiny corner of Alaska is better known in more modern times for the 2,000 acre swath that was saved from oil exploration during the Bush administration.
Image Credit: U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service/Getty Images
Though there are no roads in the wilderness area, for those seeking solitude you could do no better. As of 2012, there was only one family known to live in ANWR.
Caribou, polar bears, birds and these musk oxen will become your best friends.
Image Credit: US Fish and Wildlife Service/Getty Images
If you get lonely, progressive Canada is next door — and, if you’re lucky, you might be able to see Russia from here.
Bring everything. That includes a gun.
Leaving home to find a new place to flee from a Trump presidency is only for the most hearty and adventurous, but it can be tremendously satisfying. One caution, however: Once you’re in socialist paradise, it may be hard to make it back.
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